Saturday, February 25, 2017

Unconditional Love

Dear Readers,
Life has been busy lately, and that is all good.
Mr. UT and I both have colds, which stinks, but we carry on as best we can.
I have been having bouts of depression, and I will write about that in another post.

I was thinking of a young man in my AA group yesterday, who had recently relapsed, and is sober again. He was in tears saying how grateful he was that he had a group of people who still accepted him. He also said he was honest with a therapist for the first time ever.

How much does unconditional love factor into getting sober?
I wonder where would I be, if my hubs hadn't stuck with me through my attempts to moderate, or quit.
If my loved ones had punished me for my drinking, I am not sure I could have gotten sober. If hubs had divorced me, and my family refused to talk to me, I would have felt a deep, deep shame, and more hate about myself, but would it have helped me get sober?
For me, their love, encouragement, and support was vital.
I was loved and accepted despite having an addiction.

More importantly, I needed to be brutally honest with myself, down to my very core, finding all the hidden dark corners where the bottles and secrets were hiding, and bring them to light. 
I wonder if honesty is another form love, where I love myself enough to do the work to be healthy.

I have so much hope for the young man, as he was working through the denial that is keeping him stuck in the pain of addiction.

Each day I stay sober, I am grateful.

Much Love,
On Day 905,
Wendy

4 comments:

  1. Me too, so grateful to be sober each day. Honesty is so neccessary but I think the fear of losing love keeps us stuck in the lies. I am glad he's back on the horse:) xxx

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    1. The fact of the matter is, when I went back to group this week, he is still struggling, and gets to about 5 days, then slips.
      But I know how much I struggled, and I understand this is the nature of addiction.
      xo

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  2. So true! If my husband had been a different person, it would have been much harder for me to finally stop drinking. I didn't involve my family as much. It's almost like we are able to harness the unconditional love of someone else into self-love.
    xoxo

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    1. And maybe that's what we need at first, until we can get strong enough ourselves!
      It may be that some people need that shock, but for me, it would have made my drinking worse, as I didn't have any tools to cope yet.
      xo

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