How Much is Enough?

This is my left ear implant! I will be getting a black one to match my hair!

Dear Readers,
I am so grateful for my new implant! It is just amazing how much more I can hear with two sides of my brain hearing! I am discovering new sounds daily! 
I can hear so much better on the telephone, and hubs can walk either side of me and I can hear his conversation! 

I am just so very happy I made this decision, and that is working better than I expected. 
I am so grateful for my skilled surgeon, and my audiologist, and all the nurses, and other people who made this all possible.

My Right Ear

I told hubs the only reason I would like to live forever, is to experience all the new ways technology can help people in the future! That, and I'd love to have all doctor visits be like the ones on Star Trek, where they just wave a magic wand over you and you are all healed! 

After reading this post on Medium, by Sean Paul Mahoney, I was inspired to see if I could be thankful for for my deafness and the sufferings I have in life.
I can only speak to my experiences, but I am determined that at this stage of my life to do so. I really want to live in the manner of joy and peace, and loving all that I have. 

My sufferings are nothing compared to losing a child, or losing all my possessions in a fire, so I can never speak to those terrible losses. 

Can I be grateful I went deaf, and no longer can enjoy music? 
Can I be grateful I suffered for many years with depression and anxiety?
Can I be grateful for being ridiculed for my speech, not being accepted in a student teaching position because of it?

With my deafness comes a new empathy for all people who struggle with some form of physical disability. I have so much empathy for the feeling of loneliness that this can bring. I have a huge appreciation for the people who are working hard to make technology, and other medical advances to help us! 

Wth my depression and anxiety, I again, have greater empathy for all those who struggle with this. I am so grateful for medicine that helps me, for self-help books that have helped me, and now I am learning to love life as it comes.

With my speech issues, due to my loss of hearing, I found out I am stronger than I think. I persevered, went on to find a better student teaching position, and got help for my hearing loss. I had to go to speech lessons in college, where the therapists diagnosed I had a hearing problem. Before this all happened, I had no idea! 

I can't say I am grateful for these things, but I am thankful I have more appreciation and empathy for the suffering of humans. I have more understanding just of what it takes to live, to persevere, to overcome some of life's hard times.

I found this wonderful article on Gratitude and how it helps us.



I wrote these simple words four years ago, after my first sober Thanksgiving, and so I though I'd share them today.

How Much is Enough?

Hubs on a hill! 

Do I have enough food and clean water?
A warm, safe place to live?
Do I have the love
Of family and friends?

Do I have enough to wear?
(Well, BESIDES shoes and boots!)
Electronic toys?
Furniture?

Do I have enough money?
A way to get around?
Hot water?
Enough support?

It is important for me
To come from a place
Of all that I have,
A place of 
Constant gratitude.

Because then,
I don't try to fill up the emptiness of
What I think I don't have, 
With drinking.

I am blessed.
I have so much.
In fact, 
I have all that I need.

With Both Sides of My Brain Hearing, 
On Day 1538,
Wendy