Happy Friday!

Dear Readers,
It was raining, then snowing this morning, and then it turned SUNNY!
I am wearing my sandals now, because I just can't stand being in boots any more.
This is pretty normal weather for us in the great mid-west. 

I started my beginning drawing class last night. 
All we did was to draw boxes, cones, and spheres.
I'm not the worse one in class, nor am I the best.
Just right in the middle. (This is my opinion!)
It was fun, and I will keep going for awhile. 
Now I need to practice. 

One of my yoga teachers asked me how was sober life. She was happy for me.
I am surprised that my answer was not a cheery one. In fact, I just said "It's okay."
But as I was talking to her, I thought, well I am happy right now. So I told her that.
My Loved One is sure happy.
But honestly?
I sometimes still am a little sad I can't drink anymore.
I don't feel sorry for myself, and I am not having bad urges or anything.
It's just sometimes I still wish I could have some wine at restaurants and dinner parties.
(Not that we go to many parties.)
Sometimes I think this is related to my depression. When I am down, my views on sobriety are down. 

As more time passes, I know I will feel stronger. 
I certainly feel much stronger than 7 months ago!
I went to one of my favorite AA meetings this week, and I felt welcomed home.
I understand that these connections are very important to me, both to help me stay sober, see  good role models, and just to make a human connection.
We celebrated a man who was sober 25 years.
He is a very cool guy, who is a great help to newbies. 
I noticed the people who have been sober a long time seem much more content in life. 
They have a strong spiritual foundation. 

I do miss my Women for Sobriety friends, and might see if I can get to that meeting next week. They have a program that is very life-affirming. 

Finally, as I had said before, I had a cochlear implant put in last fall. 
The cool thing is, I can hear birds now. I haven't heard the little chirps for years!
They are noisy, and I love it!


I wish you all a wonderful weekend!

Comments

  1. I love listening to birds! I know what you mean about getting down about not drinking any more. I feel that way sometimes, but I definitely don't want to start again, wouldn't want another day one ;-) hang in there! Lori K

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Lori!
      Ugh! No day ones for me either!
      I'm feeling better!
      Thank you!
      xo

      Delete
  2. As I'm walking away on the treadmill in the morning, I can slowly hear the birds come awake as the sun comes up and they are real chatterboxes! Of course I take this for granted...maybe not as much since reading your post. Thank you.

    I'll tell you a secret...I'm still sad from time to time that I can drink - it's normal. Next week the hubs and I are going to Atlanta. Me for business and he's tagging along. Monday also happens to be our anniversary so we'll celebrate while there. I just told him this morning that I wish I could have a lovely glass of Chardonnay while we have dinner.

    But then I play that movie to the end and even now, after five years of being sober, I know that I don't just want one glass of wine...as I'm typing this I can feel the need to just keep drinking to oblivion. Sigh...

    Playing it to the end always brings me around. I'm still sad because I wish I wasn't this way but there's no wine on the planet that could take the place of my life now.

    Hugs,
    Sherry

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Sherry,
      What a beautiful response. I am almost in tears. I am glad I am normal. There is no 1 glass for me either.
      Thank you.xo

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  3. You definitely don't want another Day One. As you know, I've had many, and they are GRIM. You're doing brilliantly and I find your posts really inspiring. Annie x

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    Replies
    1. Dear Annie,
      Thank you! Day ones are awful! That's for sure!
      XO

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  4. I get what you mean about not drinking again sometimes too but would not go back! AND interesting that you note the sober people seem more content! love that.
    hugs
    Lisa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Lisa!
      I am more content, too!
      I sometimes forget that!
      I was very unhappy when I was drinking!
      Hugs to you!

      Delete

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